Albert: Oh my god, please! This is the curious thing about MacFarlane. Albert: The guy is one of the best shots around. WARNING: The rest of this article contains minor spoilers for A Million Ways To Die In The West.If you haven't seen the film, read on at your own risk! She is now with a dapper, successful, extroverted store owner, Foy, a fact Foy keeps reminding him of. "Don't go snackin' if you been tobaccin'.". 1882. 2014 Universal Studios. I'm the guy in the crowd making fun of the hero's shirt; that's who I am. Get the freshest reviews, news, and more delivered right to your inbox! Cochise: There is an ancient proverb among my people: Sometimes the only way for a man to find true happiness is to take drugs in a group. Albert: and all I had to do was distract you while the poison entered your bloodstream. It's 1882 in Arizona, the heartland of the American West. I never see him. Then Stark must put his newfound bravery to the test when Anna's outlaw husband arrives with plans to plant him in an unmarked grave. Halle Bailey, Melissa McCarthy, and director Rob Marshall share the tale behind making their underwater musical with a groundbreaking Disney princess. [Albert notices a glow from inside a building and peeks inside], [It is Doc Brown from "Back to the Future" working on the DeLorean, which is under a tarp; Doc notices Albert and covers up the car]. Seth MacFarlane directs, produces, co-writes and plays the role of the cowardly sheep farmer Albert in A Million Ways to Die in the West. Anna: God, why are the Indians always so mad? 2014 | Maturity rating: 16+ | 1h 55m | Comedies. "There it is!" "Dear God, look at it!" "It's beautiful!". The film was number three at the box office during its opening weekend and grossed over $87 million worldwide against a budget of $40 million. Chinese Date: My father is a railroad worker, like every other Chinaman. Watch A Million Ways To Die In The West: Anna Tries To Teach Albert How To Shoot, Watch A Million Ways To Die In The West: Foy Mocks Albert On Their Way To The Shooting Gallery, Watch A Million Ways To Die In The West: Anna Meets Albert At The Dance. The one thing a sheep farmer has to do is keep all of the sheep in one place, all right? Albert, in turn, has to decide when he will become a real man in doing what he needs for what, or who, he truly wants in life. At a recent press conference held in Los . 27 May 2014 Food was scarce, disease was rampant, and life was a daily struggle for survival. Listen to A Million Ways To Die In the West (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) [Deluxe Edition] by Joel McNeely on Apple Music. His comedy might be irreverent, but the key to success in a musical number, MacFarlane says, is treating your material with the utmost seriousness. Louise was right, I can't keep track of them. Albert: Oh. Albert: She moved to town a couple of years ago to take over the schoolmarm job. And, you know, the funny thing is, you don't even have to get bitten. He got . Web. Now, I knew my aim wasn't good enough to hit you anywhere important. Amick Byram. These are full loads. It starts from a clever brain that ceased emotional development at age 12 and winds its way through to the orifice that emits the rudest noises and effluence. expressly prohibited without the prior written consent of Toronto Albert: I know. rights reserved. Listen to A Million Ways To Die In the West (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) by Joel McNeely on Apple Music. You know, like snakes. Louise: You're not even a good sheep farmer, Albert. He's been dead for a few minutes. Albert: Yeah, I saw that. Gunman at Fair in Final Scene: Somebody bring me one of them white women. Narrator: Some people are born into the wrong time and place. Apple Inc. Albert: You know, there are a million ways to die in the west, Clinch. It's Me, Margaret. MacFarlane also relied on veteran singer and two-time Grammy nominee Amick Byram to do the vocals. Comedy 2014 1 hr 55 min. Doctors! One of A Million Ways to Die in the West is to give away all your jokes in the promos leading up to your film's debut. Then the mysterious Anna rides into town and captures Albert's interest and heart, but with her deadly husband in town, Albert is going to have to become the western gun-slinging hero he never was. As . A passive, shy sheep farmer tries to avoid conflict, a trait which has kept him alive but has now resulted in his girlfriend leaving him. Albert cant abide the mindless brutality, appalling hygiene and constant danger of life in Old Stump, the tumbleweed town he reluctantly calls home: Everything out here thats not you wants to kill you.. Marvel Movies Ranked Worst to Best by Tomatometer, Jurassic Park Movies Ranked By Tomatometer, RT25: Celebrating 25 Years of Rotten Tomatoes, Weekend Box Office Results: Super Mario Joins the Billion-Dollar Club. Comedy, Romance, Western. Anna and Albert. She has a problem with retardation, but she's full of love. Albert: You know what else can kill you? When a sheep herder who hates the West saves a young lady . Albert: Yeah. Anyone can read Conversations, but to contribute, you should be a registered Torstar account holder. But when her husband, a notorious outlaw, arrives seeking revenge, the farmer must put his newfound courage to the test. Edward: No I feel like I should have a piece of cake or something. Stay up-to-date on all the latest Rotten Tomatoes news! 3 likes. I'm about to shoot a full load at your cans. 'A Million Ways to Die in the West': Inside the 'Mustache Song'. After Albert backs out of a gunfight, his fickle girlfriend leaves him for another man. 17+. He gets no comfort or love from his girlfriend Louise (Amanda Seyfried), who breaks his heart by dumping him for moustachioed playboy Foy (the reliably funny Neil Patrick Harris). Her "it's not you, it's me" reason rings false as she quickly starts up with mustachioed Foy, the wealthy owner of a mustache grooming products store, he who Albert knows he cannot compete in not being wealthy enough to be able to grow a groomed mustache. Basically, if it's not you, it wants to kill you, and just might succeed. It stunts their attention span. But I got great tits. The 50 greatest TV and movie detectives of all time. Star Newspapers Limited and/or its licensors. In Seth MacFarlanes A Million Ways to Die in the West, Neil Patrick Harris takes center stage for one of the films best sequences the highly choreographed and riotously funny Mustache Song., I do always feel like everything that I do should have some sort of musical component, MacFarlane told EW. And in director/co-writer/star Seth MacFarlane's A Million Ways to Die in the West (in theaters today), Neil Patrick Harris, playing the douchebag proprietor of an Old West mustache shop, loses a . If You've Only Got a Moustache. Albert: My worst fear is to OD on a recreational drug. A 2021 study estimated more than a third of U.S. heat deaths each year can be attributed to human-caused global warming. If You've Only Got a Moustache. Albert: No, no, no, no! A Million Ways to Die in the West. It won't be easy because there are a million ways to die in the west. Apple TV & Privacy Her "it's not you, it's me" reason rings false as she quickly starts up with mustachioed Foy, the wealthy owner of a mustache grooming products store, he who Albert knows he cannot compete in not being wealthy enough to be able to grow a groomed mustache. Do you know what kind of hours he has to work? A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - That's a Dollar Bill! With Seth MacFarlane, Charlize Theron, Amanda Seyfried, Liam Neeson. Copyright 2023 Meredith Corporation. All rights reserved. There may indeed be A Million Ways to Die in the West, as the title of Seth MacFarlanes parody western asserts. Directed by Seth MacFarlane. But some men were just big giant pussies. [leaves]. Check out the interactive photo below for more details on the scene. Anna: Oh, thank God, 'cause I was like ah [mimics gun to her head] , kill me. 1882. This was the American frontier in 1882, a hard land for hard folk. Anna: I'm a little cocky. Set in 1882 in the American west, Albert is a lowly farmer with a nice girlfriend. Millie: You're okay with your girlfriend screwing, like, 15 different guys every day and getting paid to do it? R, 1 hr 55 min. Vulgar -- yes, but just not funny. Albert, in turn, has to decide when he will become a real man in doing what he needs for what, or who, he truly wants in life. Seth MacFarlane, the rowdy "Family Guy" creator who wrote, directed, and stars in the new comedy "A Million Ways to Die in the West," stopped by TODAY Thursday to talk about the film. 2014 Back Lot Music. But theres just one path to his infantile humour. Anna: There is something about connecting over mutual hatred that is just so much deeper than mutual love. Tap "Sign me up" below to receive our weekly newsletter Amick Byram. When she sees me, she'll be intimidated as f***. The only time it came out of nowhere was when Charlize said, "Hey, Ewan McGregor is doing a movie up the street!" PREVIEW. Not only did he adapt a song from the period, but he also hired a veteran choreographer and an army of Broadway dancers for the sequence. I look like I have Parkinson's next to him. 2014 Back Lot Music. 14. Even as a self-described non-dancer, MacFarlane knows how to assemble the right team for a showstopper. When a mysterious and beautiful woman rides into town, she helps him find his courage and they begin to fall in love. [stammers] It's a weather experiment. By creating an account, you agree to the MacFarlane certainly seems to embrace this contradiction. All rights reserved. For a few chuckles more. Edward: Please don't shoot us on sex night. The film features an ensemble cast including MacFarlane, Charlize Theron, Amanda Seyfried, Neil Patrick Harris, Giovanni Ribisi, Sarah Silverman and Liam Neeson. A Million Waysto Die in the West is a gross-out Gunsmoke, with MacFarlane directing an old-timey facsimile of his modern self in the lead role of Albert, a cowardly sheep herder in the Arizona of 1882. . I suck at sheep. We Should All Just Wear Coffins As Clothes, Tinker Bell and the Legend of the NeverBeast, Psycho (The Complete Original Motion Picture Score), A Million Ways To Die In the West (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), Bernard Herrmann: The Twilight Zone Conducted By Joel McNeely (Music From Television Series), Star Wars: Shadows of the Empire (Original Soundtrack), X-Men: Days of Future Past - Rogue Cut (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) [Extended Version], The Imitation Game (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), 007: Casino Royale (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) [Deluxe Version]. - Original Motion Picture Soundtrack. https://www.quotes.net/movies/a_million_ways_to_die_in_the_west_110222, A Million Ways to Die in the West Screenplay, A Million Ways to Die in the West's quotes, https://www.quotes.net/movies/a_million_ways_to_die_in_the_west_quotes_110222. Doc Brown: Nothing. I mean, sure it's faster than the Pony Express, but what good is it if you can't send a picture of your dick? Louise: [flustered] They're not that big. Here are your picks for the Best of the Capital Region 2023 However, a pistol-packing woman named Anna (Theron) rides into town and helps Albert find his inner courage. After backing out of a duel and losing his girlfriend, sheep farmer Albert slowly rebuilds his self-respect with the help of a married woman. Yet hes afraid to stray from knuckle-dragging comedy, being obsessed with jokes about farts, diarrhea and genitals that splat more often than they zing. A passive, shy sheep farmer tries to avoid conflict, a trait which has kept him alive but has now resulted in his girlfriend leaving him. A Million Ways to Die in the West is not for everyone. As Albert and Anna start to fall for each other in the process, Anna has to decide if and when she will tell him the truth: that she is already married, albeit unhappily, to Clinch Leatherwood, a vicious outlaw who, along with his gang, she and Lewis are waiting for in Old Stump. A Million Ways to Die in the West. At least stay through the weekend. Overly crude jokes and gross-out humor drag comedy down. 4:18 . This version also has even more footage in deleted scenes, and an alternate beginning and ending. Gunman at Fair in Final Scene: [after shooting someone] people die at the fair. He shows impeccable taste in how his movie looks (his DOP Michael Barrett makes Monument Valley a locale to die for) and also how it sounds. It's got to be bad for their brains, right? Anna: Yeah, well, I'll go with you. Opens Friday at major . But when her husband, a notorious outlaw, arrives seeking revenge, the farmer must put his newfound courage to the test. 1:31. Ted became one of the highest-grossing comedies ever made, he pretty much had the freedom to do whatever he wanted for his second movie. Internet Service Terms Albert is befriended by Anna, along with her "brother" Lewis who are new to Old Stump, and she who is self-admittedly "smokin' hot". See production, box office & company info. Then the mysterious Anna rides into town and captures Albert's interest and heart, but with her deadly husband in town, Albert is going to have to become the western gun-slinging hero he never was. It was released on DVD and Blu-ray on October 7, 2014, and earned more than $15 million in home media sales. Updated at 22nd July 2015 by rearranging the order of some entries: What is the Japanese language plot outline for A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)? I read an article in the paper. But if I caught you by surprise Well, Anna taught me just enough to get me in the ballpark. She is now with a dapper, successful, extroverted store owner, Foy, a fact Foy keeps reminding him of. All rights reserved. But when she leaves him for the more successful and handsome owner of a moustachery store, Albert returns to his lonely daily life of trying to avoid death. Anna and Albert. On the other hand, Albert also has to find the gunslinging skill in order to battle Louise's new boyfriend - the cocky and wealthy Foy (Neil Patrick Harris) - in a shootout in front of the entire town. Yet the screenplay he penned with Family Guy/Ted hands Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild is slapdash at best. MacFARLANE: It always depends on the gag, more than the person. Inspiration for the Work: The film originated as an inside joke between Seth MacFarlane and co-writers Alec Sulkin and Wesley Wild while they were watching Hang 'Em High. Constantly terrified, the meek and lily-livered sheep farmer, Albert Stark, mainly struggles to stay out of trouble in dusty and dangerous 1880s Arizona, utterly convinced that everything out there can and will kill him. Anna: Oh God, that was never gonna work out anyway. Apple Inc. What is the Japanese language plot outline for A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)? Stream songs including "A Million Ways To Die", "Main Title" and more. Isn't the fair on Saturday? Copyright 2023 Well, did he at least hear all the smart things I said? I'm not going to the stupid fair. After Albert backs out of a gunfight, his fickle girlfriend leaves him for another man. 27 Songs, 1 hour, 2 minutes PREVIEW. 1:31. 116 minutes. Edward: Man, I see kids everywhere with those stock hoops lately. Making a splash: A deep dive into the live-action Little Mermaid with a new generation's Ariel. After his directorial debut Ted was widely praised by critics and became one of the highest-grossing R-rated comedies ever made, Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane had the freedom to do whatever he wanted with . A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - He Drank the Whole Bowl! Opens Friday at major theatres 14A. All Rights Reserved. A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Great Scott. Your sheep are everywhere. MacFarlane deserve some credit for allowing Theron to upstage him, sometimes just with a knowing look. A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Sh**ty Showdown, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - If You've Only Got a Moustache, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - You Really Do Have a Death Wish. After Seth MacFarlane's directorial debut Ted became one of the highest-grossing comedies ever made, he pretty much had the freedom to do whatever he wanted for his second movie. Vulgar, crude, self-referential, and irreverent, A Million Ways to Die in the West is a typical Seth MacFarlane comedy. You can't blame Seth MacFarlane, that one-man comedy . He was Methodist, I'm half Jewish. But, just how many ways to die are there in the west? Copyright 2023 A Million Ways to Die in the West: Trailer 1, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Ways to Die, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Eddie's Girl, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Things Could Be a Lot Worse, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Eddie's First Time. It won't be easy because there are a million ways to die in the west. But when her husband, a notorious outlaw, arrives seeking revenge, the farmer must put . But when she leaves him for the more successful and handsome owner of a moustachery store, Albert returns to his lonely daily life of trying to avoid death. Albert Stark, a mild mannered sheep farmer living outside of Old Stump, Arizona, hates everything about living in this time and place, especially the literally million ways he and others can easily die every day without a care, from shoot-outs, to bar brawls, to bites by rattlesnakes hiding in outhouses, to affliction by any one of numerous untreatable plagues and pestilences. As a cowardly farmer begins to fall for the mysterious new woman in town, he must put his newly found courage to the test when her husband, a notorious gun-slinger, announces his arrival.As a cowardly farmer begins to fall for the mysterious new woman in town, he must put his newly found courage to the test when her husband, a notorious gun-slinger, announces his arrival.As a cowardly farmer begins to fall for the mysterious new woman in town, he must put his newly found courage to the test when her husband, a notorious gun-slinger, announces his arrival. , and to receive email from Rotten Tomatoes. But, just how many ways to die are there in the west? Sign in to rate and Watchlist for personalized recommendations. When the rivalry leads to a duel, he gets help from an unexpected, beautiful source. Depressed and discouraged by how his life is full of disappointment and how every instance of love is then destroyed and robbed from him, Albert finds comfort in Anna (Charlize Theron), a newcomer to his small village.